[pinkpanther]

Some Famous hadith on foreplay:

a) al Ghazali mentioned this hadith of the topic and said:

ثم إذا قضى وطره فليتمهل على أهله حتى تقضي هي أيضاً نَهْمتها ؛ فإن إنزالها ربما يتأخر فتَهيجُ شهوتُها ، ثم القعود عنها إيذاءٌ لها ، والاختلاف في طبع الإنزال يوجب التنافر مهما كان الزوج سابقاً إلى الإنزال ، والتوافق في وقت الإنزال ألذ عندها ، ولا يشتغل الرجل بنفسه عنها فإنها ربما تستحي .

When his semen comes out let him keep his body over her until her semen comes out as well because (sometimes) her semen comes out late. It will be painful for her to be separated from the husband when her sexual desire is high.

[Ihya Uloom al Din ( 2 / 50 )]

b) Ibn al Qayyim said:

وممَّا ينبغى تقديُمُه على الجِماع : ملاعبةُ المرأة ، وتقبيلُها ، ومصُّ لِسانها ، وكان رسول الله صَلَّى اللَّهُ عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ يُلاعبُ أهله ، ويُقَبلُها .

He should fondle his wife first before having sex by kissing her and sucking her tongue. The Prophet peace be upon him used to fondle and kiss his wives.

[Zaad al Maad 4/253]

C) Imam Ibn Qudaamah (may Allah have mercy on him) said:

: " ويستحب أن يلاعِب امرأته قبل الجماع ؛ لتنهض شهوتُها ، فتنال من لذة الجماع مثل ما ناله "

It is mustahabb to engage in foreplay with one’s wife before having intercourse and to arouse her desire, so that she will get the same enjoyment from intercourse as he does. [Al-Mughni, 8/136].

So what ever way the fondling is done is permissible and rewarding in Islam as long as no fondling or penetration of the anal region but the Hanafi school of thought also permits fondling of the anal region as long as no penetration.

So yeah muslim men are encouraged to do that and they also earn reward for doing it. So you are at no loss at all.